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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27426901">Offspring Tales</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/ElvenQueen18/pseuds/ElvenQueen18'>ElvenQueen18</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Rosawatts Headcanon-verse [8]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>To the Moon Series (Video Games)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, F/M, Family Angst, Family Fluff, Father-Daughter Relationship, Future Fic, Mother-Daughter Relationship, Neil and Eva as Parents, Other</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-07 00:21:11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>10,367</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27426901</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/ElvenQueen18/pseuds/ElvenQueen18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>A series of one-shots about Neil and Eva being parents.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Eva Rosalene/Neil Watts</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Rosawatts Headcanon-verse [8]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2003632</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. The Family That Plays Together</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>On the TV screen, a Pidgey was facing off against a Magneton on a grassy battlefield. In the upper right-hand corner, in between Magneton’s name and its low-yellow health bar, was the word <em>POISON</em> in purple letters, while Pidgey’s battle info—its name, dangerously low-red health bar, and the yellow <em>PARALYZE</em>—was in the opposite corner. An unseen announcer commentated as Magneton used Screech, only for the Defense-lowering move to miss Pidgey.</p><p>Before Pidgey could attempt to launch an attack, Magneton’s health decreased to zero. The defeated Magnet Pokémon shook as though having a seizure before its metal components broke apart and it returned to its Poké Ball.</p><p>“And there goes the battle!” the announcer exclaimed as the victory music started playing, accompanied by the bright orange <em>End Battle!</em> text below the image of Pidgey.</p><p>“Yes! I won!” Grace cheered from where she sat on the couch, pumping a fist into the air.</p><p>“Aw, man,” Neil groaned, setting his controller aside. “This stinks. I was <em>so</em> sure I could win!”</p><p>“Congratulations, Grace,” Eva said, stepping from the living room’s threshold and to her husband’s side of the couch. “And congratulations for getting beaten by a six-year-old,” she told Neil, who had his lower lip stuck out in an exaggerated pout.</p><p>“Must you rub it in when I’m already feeling lousy?”</p><p>“Sorry, Daddy,” Grace said, patting Neil on the arm with the hand that wasn’t holding her controller, her green eyes earnest. “But you did really good! You’ll win next time, I promise!”</p><p>Neil looked down and gave Grace a smile. “Thanks, princess.” He pretended to sniffle. “At least someone here believes in me.”</p><p>Eva had to disguise her chuckle as a cough. She knew perfectly well Neil’s little sore-loser attitude was just for show, even if Grace thought he was being serious.</p><p>“But hey,” Neil continued, “remember that prize we agreed on?”</p><p>“That’s right!” Grace’s olive face lit up as she turned her attention to Eva. “I get to battle you next, Mama!”</p><p>“Really?” Eva smiled teasingly. “You sure you want to do that? I’m not as much of a soft touch as Daddy.”</p><p>Grace nodded vigorously as Neil gasped in feigned offense. “Eva, I am <em>not</em> a soft touch!”</p><p>“Whatever you say, Neil.” She saw with her own two eyes how he had his second to last Pokémon, Snorlax, keep using Rest while Grace maxed out Pidgey’s evasiveness with Double Team. If that wasn’t her husband being a soft touch when it came to their little girl, then nothing was.</p><p>Neil handed his controller to Eva and pulled Grace into his lap to give Eva room to settle on the couch. Grace pressed a button to return to the Free Battle screen and reselected her registered team: Butterfree, Pidgey, a female Nidoran, Clefairy, Eevee, and Flareon. On Eva’s turn to pick a team, she selected Vileplume, Parasect, Poliwag, Tentacruel, Gastly, and Porygon from the list of rental Pokémon. After both mother and daughter had chosen the order their Pokémon would be listed in, the screen returned to the grassy battlefield.</p><p>“The Free Battle is on!” the announcer began as Grace’s Butterfree and Eva’s Poliwag emerged from their Poké Balls. “The champions of tomorrow have begun their super-hot battle!”</p><p>The first attack made by Poliwag was Surf, which took out less than fifty points of Butterfree’s health. Butterfree countered by paralyzing Poliwag with Stun Spore, then draining about half its health with Mega Drain. Poliwag managed to resist its paralysis in order to use Amnesia to increase its Special, but one Psychic and then a second Mega Drain from Butterfree were enough for Poliwag to go down.</p><p>“What was that you were saying about a soft touch?” Neil asked with a grin as Poliwag was withdrawn into its Poké Ball.</p><p>Eva’s only response was to select her next Pokémon. The minutes passed as the battle went on, and the room was filled with the sound effects of the Pokémon’s moves, the commentary of the announcer, and—best of all—Grace’s happy giggles whenever Neil tickled her ribs.</p><p>Whether Eva won or lost, if Grace was having the time of her life, then that was all that mattered.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Doubts on a Car Ride Home</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>In the nearly twenty years and counting that she’d spent as a memory traversal agent, Eva heard her share of criticism about the work she did. Whether from anti-Sigmund protesters or family members of clients, accusations of invading the privacy and disrespecting the original memories of dying people had been flung around more times than she cared to admit. The more radical of such people even deemed those who worked in memory alternation as fraudulent murderers, claiming that the latter didn’t truly grant their patients’ last wishes, but instead used the machine to kill them.</p><p>After almost half a lifetime of being a Sigmund Corp. employee, Eva liked to think that she had developed a pretty thick skin. Long gone were the days when a single protest outside headquarters could unnerve her enough to wonder if the critics were right. Still, it didn’t mean that certain criticisms didn’t bother her sometimes, particularly if they were less about her job itself and more about how her job affected other aspects of her life.</p><p>Driving home from a birthday party for one of Grace’s kindergarten classmates, Eva found her mind wandering to the conversation she’d had with Mariko Reynolds, a fellow mother whose daughter was also in Grace’s class. Well, it was less a conversation and more like an impeccably polite diatribe. As tempted as she’d been to take a leaf out of Neil’s book and come up with some rude answer to Mariko’s condescending remarks, she had forced herself to stay civil, not wanting to start drama at a six-year-old girl’s party.</p><p>Eva glanced into the rear view mirror and smiled to see Grace napping peacefully in her car seat, her long black hair covering half of her face. In the passenger’s seat, Neil looked over his shoulder and gave their daughter a quick, fond grin.</p><p>“Gracie’s got the right idea,” he told Eva. “Do you realise that I had about thirty minutes of my life stolen by a dad who thought I’d be interested in listening to him blather on about bathroom renovations? I was about to drop off to sleep standing up. That, or start throwing cupcakes at him.”</p><p>“Hmm,” was Eva’s only response, her smile having faded.</p><p>“What, no clever quip?” Neil asked rhetorically. “Don’t tell me you’re bored just <em>hearing</em> about my boredom.”</p><p>“No, it’s not that, I was just...” Eva’s voice trailed off as they stopped at a red light.</p><p>“You were just...?” he prompted after a few seconds.</p><p>“I was thinking about what Mariko said to me.”</p><p>“Who’s Mariko?”</p><p>“Cassie’s mother.”</p><p>“Was Cassie the birthday girl?”</p><p>“No, that was Jessica. Cassie’s the one with long red hair.”</p><p>“Oh.” The light turned green and Eva resumed driving before Neil asked, “So, what exactly did Mariko say?”</p><p>“Well, for starters,” Eva said, “she told me how difficult it must be for us, having to leave Grace with a nanny because of our full-time jobs.”</p><p>Neil snorted; they were both quite familiar with subtle and not so subtle jabs about their decision to hire someone to look after their daughter while they worked. “Was that a dig at us for supposedly caring more about our jobs than our kid? Or did she think Grace loves Ruth more than us?”</p><p>“I didn’t ask. She also said that children of parents who work in memory alternation are statistically more likely to have emotional problems and difficulties in school.”</p><p>Neil was silent a moment. “I suddenly have the very strong urge to ask you to turn this car around and go back so I can yell at this B-I-T-C-H.”</p><p>Eva shook her head. “It wouldn’t be worth it, Neil.”</p><p>“Sure it would,” he insisted. “It’d get Mariko off her high horse.”</p><p>“Kitties...” Grace murmured before Eva could reply. She looked into the mirror again and watched Grace happily smile in her sleep, her heart melting at the sight. Eva would have given up her right eye if it meant her daughter could always be so happy as to find joy in a dream about kittens.</p><p>“We are doing right by her, aren’t we?” she asked after a moment.</p><p>“Hey, c’mon, Eva.” Neil slid his fingers through her hair. “Everyone not totally braindead knows statistics are bunk. That woman doesn’t know what she’s talking about.”</p><p>“No one said Grace would always be okay with us working so much.”</p><p>“Grace knows we love her. That’s gotta count for something.”</p><p>When Eva didn’t say anything, Neil sighed. “Y’know,” he said, “I stopped caring what people think of how we live our lives a long time ago. I wish you would, too.”</p><p>“I don’t care if Mariko wants to insinuate things about us, but when it’s about our daughter...”</p><p>Neil paused, his hand leaving Eva’s hair. “You sure you don’t want to turn the car around so I can yell at her?”</p><p>“And give her an excuse to sue us for emotional distress? Not a chance.”</p><p>“Emotional distress, my foot,” Neil scoffed. “If that was legit grounds for a lawsuit, I could’ve sued the maintenance department a million times over.”</p><p>Eva rolled her eyes, but she still felt the corners of her mouth twitching upward at the image of Neil repeatedly suing the maintenance department for emotional distress caused by what he thought of as their incompetence. If that was his way of making her feel better, she couldn’t say it wasn’t working. And he wasn’t wrong—Grace did love them dearly even if their jobs didn’t allow them to spend as much time with her as they would’ve liked. As for Grace’s school performance, her teacher hadn’t given them any cause for concern so far—Grace hadn’t had any nervous breakdowns or temper tantrums, and she was doing well in her lessons about the alphabet, shapes, and simple addition and subtraction. And even if—or when—problems eventually came up, not only could those problems be solved, it wouldn’t make Eva or Neil love Grace any less.</p><p>“You know what?” Neil said at length, laying his hand on Eva’s knee. “Grace had fun at the party, I survived banal suburbia, and you endured Mariko’s judgemental ignorance. Why don’t we order hamburgers for dinner tonight?”</p><p>“Neil, we have hamburger meat at home,” Eva protested.</p><p>“Yeah, but that would involve one of us doing the cooking.”</p><p>“You love cooking.”</p><p>“Even the most awesome chefs need a night off, doll.”</p><p>Eva raised an eyebrow. “And I can’t just make hamburgers at home because...?”</p><p>Neil gave a half-shrug. “Consider it your reward for not biting Mariko’s head off even though she would’ve deserved it. You didn’t, right?”</p><p>“You’d be the first to hear it if I did.”</p><p>“So whaddya say?” Neil squeezed Eva’s knee, causing her to gasp a little. “You can choose the burger joint if you want.”</p><p>“...I guess I can think about it.”</p><p>“In Eva-ese, that means yes,” Neil said, grinning.</p><p>Eva grunted softly, once again fighting back a smile. At this point, what Mariko Reynolds thought about anything was the last thing on her mind.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Nighttime Cuddles</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>One week had passed since Grace’s birth, and Neil didn’t know which was worse—being away from his daughter all day and part of the night because of his job, or having to work with some recently hired nobody while his wife was on maternity leave. When he wasn’t mentally counting up all the reasons why his temporary partner paled in comparison to Eva (the kid wasn’t as smart as Eva, as witty as Eva, as fun to banter with as Eva...), he was worrying about how Grace was doing. Did she look healthy? Was her temperature normal? Was she in any pain? So far, there was nothing out of the ordinary as far as Grace’s health was concerned, but even so, Neil always felt better when he could see for himself that she was okay.</p><p>It was shortly after eleven P.M. when Neil made it home. He strode into the house without even bothering to take off his lab coat and found his family in his and Eva’s room, Grace sleeping in her bassinet and Eva lying in bed, half-asleep herself. Neil took a moment to gaze down at his daughter and gently stroke her jet black hair before going to his side of the bed, taking off his shoes and lying down.</p><p>“Hey there,” he whispered to Eva, pulling her close to him and giving her a quick kiss.</p><p>“Why’re you still dressed?” she asked softly after they broke apart.</p><p>“Lovely to see you, too, dear.” Neil let out a quiet snort. “I’ll get into my PJs as soon as my limbs decide to work again.”</p><p>Eva hummed. “Figured you’d say something like that.”</p><p>“I could’ve said something else, but I’ve come to appreciate kid-friendliness these days. And speaking of kids, how was Grace?”</p><p>“Normal. She cried when she was hungry or needed changing, and slept every hour or so. How was work?”</p><p>“Brain-numbingly boring without you there.”</p><p>It was Eva’s turn to snort. “Aiden can’t be that bad of a partner.”</p><p>“Aiden isn’t you, Eva,” Neil said. “Of course he’s that bad. He doesn’t even look old enough to order beer.”</p><p>“So you’ve said.”</p><p>“All I’m saying is that the higher-ups ought to check if new recruits have real IDs.”</p><p>Eva hummed again, then spoke after a moment of silence. “I miss you, too, you know. The house gets really quiet without you.”</p><p>“Grace makes plenty of noise herself,” Neil pointed out.</p><p>“Sure, when she’s awake,” Eva reminded him, “but even when—”</p><p>She never got to finish; from both the bassinet and the baby monitor on the night table (three months ago, Neil didn’t understand why Eva would want a baby monitor if the baby was going to be sleeping in their room for a long while—now he did), Grace started wailing.</p><p>“I’ll get her,” Neil said quickly as Eva sat up. He got up from bed and hurried to the bassinet, gathering the baby in his arms.</p><p>“Is she wet?” Eva asked while Grace continued crying.</p><p>Neil checked. “No. You think she’s hungry?”</p><p>“I breastfed her fifteen minutes before you came home, but...” Eva’s voice trailed off as she watched Grace being rocked and patted by Neil; by now, the baby’s wails were diminishing to whimpers. “No, she’s not. She’s not rooting or sucking her fingers.”</p><p>“Maybe she just wants attention. That it, princess?” Neil lifted Grace to his shoulder and rubbed her back, his voice becoming soft. “You just want a cuddle? Don’t worry, Daddy can do that. Daddy’s got ya.”</p><p>Soon enough, Grace stopped whimpering and relaxed in Neil’s embrace. He held her for a little while longer before reluctantly returning the now sleeping baby to her bassinet.</p><p>When he returned his attention to Eva, he found that she was lying back down, her face in her pillow and her shoulders shaking. He went back to bed, calling her name, and she rolled around to face him, her cheeks wet with tears.</p><p>“I think I need a cuddle now,” she choked out, pulling him into a hug and burying her face into his neck. Her breath came out in gasps. “Cucumbers, just seeing you with her, holding her...”</p><p>“Does something to your hormones, huh?” Neil said, wrapping his arms around her.</p><p>Eva sniffled. “Don’t take it too personally. This afternoon, I cried over a flowers commercial.”</p><p>“That must’ve been one heck of a commercial.”</p><p>She sniffled again, and they stayed in each other’s arms, the only sounds in the room being Eva’s stifled, hormone-induced sobs and Grace’s breathing. It was a few moments before Eva calmed down and the two could get ready to sneak in some sleep.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Pink or Blue?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Eva had put a lasagna in the oven and finished making a salad before she heard the phone ring. She picked up on the second ring and pressed the phone to her ear.</p><p>“Neil, where are you?” she asked. “Dinner’s almost ready.”</p><p>He ignored her question. “Eva, pink or blue?”</p><p>“Neither—green.”</p><p>“Huh?”</p><p>“Are you asking me my favorite color?”</p><p>“No, I’m asking you if I should get a pink or blue Princess Aurora costume for Grace.”</p><p>“I thought we agreed she’d be a pumpkin this year.”</p><p>“Eva, everyone and their dog is going to be a pumpkin this year. Literally—I just overheard some lady saying she wants a pumpkin costume for her dog.”</p><p>“So? The pumpkin costume’s a classic.”</p><p>“And therefore too mainstream. Which brings us back to my original question: pink or blue?”</p><p>“Well, if you’re going to be changing Grace’s costume at the last minute, I’d say blue.”</p><p>“Grace is pretty girly, though. She’d love the pink dress.”</p><p>“Blue would go better with her skin and bring out her eyes.”</p><p>“Dear Lord, Eva, this ain’t a beauty contest. Though, if it were, she’d totally win. Our girl’s the prettiest thing this side of Jupiter. She gets it from her mother.”</p><p>“Flattery will get you nowhere, Dr. Watts,” Eva said, hoping he could hear her eye-roll over the phone.</p><p>“Really, Dr. Rosalene?” Neil asked, amused. “’Cause that’s not what I heard you say last—”</p><p>“<em>Anyway</em>,” Eva cut him off before he could finish, feeling heat creep into her cheeks, “why are you asking in the first place if you’ve already decided on pink?”</p><p>“I wanted my wife’s opinion. Nothing wrong with that.”</p><p>“As long as you actually <em>do</em> want your wife’s opinion.”</p><p>“What’s Grace doing, anyway?”</p><p>“Playing in the living room. Why?”</p><p>“Ask her. It’ll break the tie.”</p><p>“Seriously, Neil?”</p><p>“Just ask her, the line’s moving fast.”</p><p>Eva sighed and headed to the living room, where her three-year-old daughter was brushing the hair of one of her dolls. “Grace, pink or blue?”</p><p>“Pink!” Grace exclaimed at once, beaming up at her mother.</p><p>“Did you hear that?” Eva asked into the phone.</p><p>“One pink Aurora costume coming right up. I’ll be home soon.”</p><p>“Don’t run over any squirrels.”</p><p>“Oh, ha-ha.”</p><p>And with that, Eva ended the call and went back to the kitchen to return the phone to its base. She returned to the living room and got down on the carpet next to Grace, rubbing the toddler’s back.</p><p>“I should have known you’d choose pink,” she said, smiling slightly. “Does Daddy know you well, Grace?”</p><p>“Yes.”</p><p>Eva kissed Grace’s head, her smile widening.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. And Kitty Makes Four</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Ohhh, they’re so <em>cute</em>!” Grace gushed as she stared into a pen of six mewling kittens.</p>
<p>An animal shelter employee, a middle-aged woman with graying brown hair, smiled down at the seven-year-old girl. “You like those little guys, don’t you?”</p>
<p>“Uh-huh!” Grace got up from where she’d been kneeling on the floor and gave Eva and Neil a pleading look. “Can I have them all, please? Please?”</p>
<p>“Now, Grace, we talked about this,” Eva reminded her. “We agreed that one kitten is enough, remember? And those kittens look too young for us to adopt anyway.”</p>
<p>If Eva had to guess, the kittens—one Siamese, one black, one ginger, and three gray with black stripes—were about eight weeks old. Although eight weeks was the minimum age where kittens were deemed old enough to be given to a new home, with Eva and Neil’s unpredictable work hours and Grace having to go back to school in little under a month, Eva would rather they got an older kitten.</p>
<p>“But <em>Mama</em>—”</p>
<p>“Is right, hun,” Neil interrupted. “I know tiny kittens are adorable, but they’re not old enough to be home alone all day.”</p>
<p>Grace’s face fell.</p>
<p>“If you’re looking for an older kitten,” the woman told Eva and Neil, “we’ve got some right over here.”</p>
<p>As they followed the woman to the back of the room, passing more pens containing kittens of various breeds and colors, Eva heard Neil loudly whisper to Grace, “If you like the older kittens, I’ll try to convince Mama to get you two of them.”</p>
<p>“I heard that,” Eva said, raising an unamused eyebrow at Neil. Going from agreeing with her to being soft on their daughter in less than a minute had to be some kind of record.</p>
<p>“Here we are,” the woman announced before Neil could reply. She gestured towards a pen with two white Persian kittens who were play fighting with each other. “These two are twelve weeks old.”</p>
<p>Grace perked up and once again knelt by the pen. “Aw, they’re cute, too!” she exclaimed happily. “And really fluffy!” She got to her feet and turned her attention to Eva, clasping her hands in front of her. “Mama, can we—”</p>
<p>“No, Grace,” Eva cut in firmly, “we’re not getting two kittens.”</p>
<p>“Oh, come on, Eva,” Neil protested. “Two kittens could keep each other company when we’re not at home.”</p>
<p>“And two kittens mean more fun!” Grace chimed in.</p>
<p>“Two kittens mean two food bowls, two water dishes, and four litter boxes to look after,” Eva pointed out. “Not to mention doubling the chances of our furniture getting torn to shreds.”</p>
<p>Neil tsked. “How very pessimistic of you, dumpling.”</p>
<p>“You won’t be saying that after two kittens destroy our couch, climb our curtains, and knock over our TV.”</p>
<p>Grace opened her mouth to say something, but was distracted by meowing coming from another pen. Against the left-hand wall, an American Shorthair kitten that looked a few weeks older than the two Persians was batting at the pen’s glass door. The kitten’s short, smooth fur was white with black and red patches on its head, back, and tail, and it was staring at Grace with almond hazel eyes.</p>
<p>Grace stepped closer to get a better look at the kitten. “Hello there, kitty,” she said. “Were you talking to me?”</p>
<p>The kitten meowed again, and Grace giggled.</p>
<p>“Looks like you won’t have to worry about two fluffy little terrors after all,” Neil quietly deadpanned to Eva.</p>
<p>“You say that like I was about to cave in,” was her whispered retort.</p>
<p>“Would you like to pet her?” the woman was asking, and Grace nodded eagerly. The woman opened the pen and gently picked the kitten up in her arms. Grace petted the kitten’s head and stroked her chin, and the kitten purred at the affection.</p>
<p>“Her fur’s so soft,” Grace murmured. With one last pet on the head, Grace turned to Eva and Neil with a bright smile. “I’m naming her Maizie!”</p>
<p>“Wow, you named her already?” Neil asked rhetorically, grinning. “She must be a keeper, eh, Eva?”</p>
<p>“Must be,” Eva agreed.</p>
<p>Later, as they walked out of the shelter with Maizie in Grace’s arms, their daughter chattering excitedly to her new pet, Eva silently thanked her lucky stars that Grace hadn’t been enamored enough over the younger kittens to give them names.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Not Yet Boy-Crazy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I make a reference to the 1985 film Clue in this one-shot (well, sort of; if you’ve watched the film, you’ll know what I mean).</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“...and then Bianca ditched us to go to the mall with some boys!” Grace finished in exasperation as she rinsed a glass and stuck it in the upper rack of the dishwasher.</p><p>“Sounds like she hasn’t been a good friend lately,” Neil commented, washing a plate and handing it to Grace. It was his night to do dishes with her help, and he’d just spent the last several minutes listening to her vent about her day, which had apparently been ruined in no small part by Bianca, one of Grace’s closest friends since kindergarten.</p><p>Grace huffed. “You can say that again,” she went on, rinsing the suds off the plate. “Did I tell you that Molly and I had to listen to her blather on about if James or Jason was cuter? They’re twins—they look exactly the same! And they’re dumber than rocks! What’s so cute about <em>that</em>?” She pushed the upper rack in with a little more force than necessary and stooped to put the plate in the lower rack.</p><p>The corners of Neil’s mouth involuntarily twitched upward—of course he and Eva would’ve made a kid who had no patience for idiocy. Out loud, while scrubbing the next plate, he said, “I’m sorry you had to listen to it, princess.”</p><p>“I just wish things could go back to normal,” Grace said. “Y’know, hang out at each other’s houses, talk about something that <em>isn’t</em> boys...”</p><p>“I can see if I can get a hold of her medical history if you want. Maybe Bianca’s got an advanced case of the flu. Or an alien might’ve taken her over.”</p><p>Grace laughed.</p><p>“Neil, don’t joke like that,” Eva’s voice broke in.</p><p>Neil looked over his shoulder to see his wife giving him a disapproving frown from the living room. Eva was sitting in an armchair with her laptop on her lap, and a snoozing Maizie was curled up on the carpet near her feet.</p><p>Grace’s laughter subsided as she also looked over at her mother. “Well, Daddy’s not really wrong. Bianca’s totally become a different person!”</p><p>“Raging hormones have nothing to do with alien takeovers,” Eva pointed out.</p><p>“Maybe not,” Neil said, “but if she’s choosing boys over friends, I say Grace drop her like a hot tamale.”</p><p>“Yeah!” Grace agreed. “Then she’d know what it feels like to be ditched!”</p><p>“Grace, that’s not very nice,” Eva chided.</p><p>“But Bianca isn’t being nice either!”</p><p>“She’s got a point there,” Neil said, now not bothering to hide his amused grin.</p><p>Eva rolled her eyes. “Just finish up and we’ll talk more about this later.”</p><p>Afterward, once all the dishes had been washed, rinsed, and put in the dishwasher to dry, Neil and Grace went into the living room, where Eva was now sitting on the couch, her laptop left on the chair. Grace made to scurry down the hallway, but Eva spoke up before she could get very far.</p><p>“It’s now later, Grace.”</p><p>Grace pouted. “I thought ‘later’ meant ‘bedtime.’”</p><p>“It didn’t. Come here.”</p><p>With a sigh and slumped shoulders, Grace walked to the couch and sat down next to Eva, while Neil stepped over to their daughter’s side of the couch.</p><p>“You remember those talks about puberty we’ve had?” Eva asked. “About getting breasts and times of the month and all that?”</p><p>“Please, there are men and cats present!” Neil interjected.</p><p>Grace only nodded.</p><p>“Well,” Eva continued, “that’s what Bianca’s going through right now. She can’t help that her body’s hormones are changing. Is that worth losing a friend over?”</p><p>“I’m not the one who decided I didn’t like my friends anymore!” Grace argued. “Or that the universe revolves around boys!”</p><p>Eva put a hand on Grace’s shoulder. “Look, I’m not saying it’s wrong to feel frustrated about Bianca’s boy obsession—”</p><p>“Especially if these boys are making rocks look like they’re related to us,” Neil quipped.</p><p>“But I think you can try to be more patient with her,” Eva went on as if he hadn’t said anything. “Some girls go boy-crazy for a while and then calm down about it. It doesn’t mean Bianca likes you and Molly any less.”</p><p>Grace raised an eyebrow, looking highly skeptical and even more like her mother than usual.</p><p>“You’ll be going through this sort of thing, too, you know,” Eva said, dropping her hand from Grace’s shoulder.</p><p>“No, I won’t!” Grace protested.</p><p>“Eva, don’t say that!” Neil exclaimed at the same time, abruptly feeling dinner churn in his stomach.</p><p>“Every kid experiences puberty,” Eva told Grace, unfazed by the reactions she’d gotten. “Like it or not, it’s a part of growing up.”</p><p>Grace crossed her arms, scowling. “If growing up means getting a head full of nothing but boys, then I don’t want to grow up.”</p><p>“Hear, hear,” Neil said.</p><p>Eva shook her head. “You say that now, Grace, but one day, you may decide boys who aren’t Daddy aren’t so bad after all. Right now, though, give Bianca some time. I promise her boy-craziness won’t last forever.”</p><p>“Okay,” Grace said, not sounding convinced. She stood up from the couch. “Can I go now?”</p><p>“You can.”</p><p>Grace left the living room and disappeared down the hall. Once he knew she was out of earshot, Neil sighed and sat down in Grace’s previous spot on the couch.</p><p>“Can’t we skip the part of puberty where our daughter starts liking boys?” he asked Eva.</p><p>“The answer is highly likely to be no,” she replied. She smiled a bit. “Sorry, Neil.”</p><p>His only response was to groan and hope—not for the first time—that certain <em>effects</em> of puberty would take its sweet time to arrive.</p>
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<a name="section0007"><h2>7. A Mishap in Keeping Warm</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“There ya go, princess.” Neil looked up from where he’d put a unicorn Band-Aid on the back of Grace’s hand and helped her get down from the bathroom counter.</p>
<p>Grace sniffled. “Thanks, Daddy.”</p>
<p>“Can you tell me what happened now?” Neil asked. Earlier, he’d heard Grace wail in pain and immediately ran from the living room to his and Eva’s bedroom. There, he’d found a torn piece of blue clothing, his weeping daughter on her knees and clutching at her hand, and Maizie, who darted out of the room like she was being chased by dogs. The last time Neil had seen his daughter and her cat had only been about five minutes ago, when they’d been playing in Grace’s room, and he’d had no idea what could’ve happened to make Grace so upset so quickly. In any case, she’d been crying too hard to tell Neil what was going on, but a hug, some soothing noises, and tending to her scratch had more or less calmed her down.</p>
<p>“Maizie was staring out at the snow,” Grace said. “I thought she wanted to go play outside, so I tried to put a sweater on her.”</p>
<p>“Why would she need a sweater? She’s got a fur coat.”</p>
<p>“Yeah, but it’s short. Short fur means she gets cold easier than cats with long fur.”</p>
<p>“So how’d that work out for you?”</p>
<p>An unhappy frown crossed Grace’s face. “Maizie didn’t like it. I tried telling her the sweater would keep her warm, but she kept making noise and moving around.”</p>
<p>“And getting her claws into anything that touched her?”</p>
<p>Grace nodded, not realizing that Neil was being rhetorical.</p>
<p>“Well,” he continued, “now we know, right? No putting clothes on the kitty.”</p>
<p>“Yes, Daddy.”</p>
<p>“Whose sweater did you use, anyway?”</p>
<p>“One of Mama’s.”</p>
<p><em>Oh, crap.</em> Neil resisted the urge to groan. Eva was going to kill him when she got back.</p>
<p>“Am I gonna get grounded?” Grace asked, looking at her father anxiously.</p>
<p>Neil tried to smile. “No, no, hun; you’re not going to get grounded.” Eva would be angry enough to lecture Grace, certainly, but she didn’t love that blue sweater <em>that</em> much. “I think Mama will want to talk about not messing with her stuff, though.”</p>
<p>Eva would also bite Neil’s head off about not keeping an eye on what their daughter was doing, but Grace didn’t need to hear that.</p>
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<a name="section0008"><h2>8. An Early Christmas Morning</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Merry Christmas, readers! ^_^</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Neil swore softly as the tape he was working with somehow wrapped around his finger and stuck to itself. He abandoned Grace’s partially wrapped present long enough to peel the tape off and get a new one. The last flap of the Christmas-tree-and-snowman-decorated wrapping paper was quickly sealed, and Neil grabbed a red bow from the bag sitting on his and Eva’s bed to stick on the newly wrapped box.</p><p>He was about to get a label for the present when he heard the door open. Neil turned to see Eva walking in, dressed in pajamas and a bathrobe and holding a mug of something steaming.</p><p>“I’d ask if that’s hot chocolate,” he said with a hint of a smirk, “but you’d probably be breaking out in hives if it was.”</p><p>“Hilarious, Neil,” Eva deadpanned. “Our diet already takes a nosedive in winter—no need to make it worse by drinking liquid sugar.”</p><p>“Eva, if there’s any time of the year when you can drink whatever you want and to hell with the consequences, it’s Christmas.”</p><p>“Is that why I haven’t seen you with a single shot of alcohol five Christmases in a row?”</p><p>“I just so happen to be setting an example for our little girl.” Neil grinned, then sobered after a few seconds. “So, anyway, I guess Grace is sleeping now?”</p><p>Eva nodded. “She’s out like a light.”</p><p>“And here I was thinking she’d be too keyed up to fall asleep before midnight.”</p><p>“Not even Christmas cheer can overpower genetics.” Eva took a sip of her drink, which Neil belatedly realized from the smell was tea. “Are you done with the gifts?”</p><p>“Almost—just gotta finish with Grace’s.”</p><p>Neil returned his attention to his daughter’s present and quickly affixed a label on the front, writing <em>To: Grace From: Santa</em>.</p><p>“A couple more things left to do,” Eva said, “and then we can go to bed.”</p><p>Neil grabbed both Grace’s present and his gift to Eva—a small box wrapped in gold paper—from the bed and followed his wife to the living room. He slipped Eva’s present into her stocking, and she took Grace’s gift from him to put under the tree, next to her present to him, a large, rectangular box wrapped in red paper and topped with a green bow.</p><p>With that done, Eva went over to the coffee table and picked up one of the Christmas M&amp;M’s cookies on a plate.</p><p>Neil raised his eyebrows. “I thought you said no sugar allowed.”</p><p>“I’m willing to put up with a lot for the sake of our daughter,” Eva said, taking a bite out of the cookie. “It’s either this or trying to explain to Grace why Santa didn’t want our cookies.”</p><p>“We could tell her that Santa isn’t real.”</p><p>“You want to tell a five-year-old that jolly old Saint Nick doesn’t exist?”</p><p>Neil paused, imagining Grace’s bright green eyes filling with tears after hearing that Santa was make-believe. “Good point,” he said, snatching up a cookie off the plate and cramming it into his mouth.</p><p>Soon enough, all the cookies were eaten, Neil drained the glass of milk next to the plate, and Eva finished with her tea. They returned to their room, where Eva settled herself beneath the sheets and Neil put away the gift-wrapping supplies and got ready for bed. He put his glasses on his night table and flopped down beside Eva, laying an arm around her and pulling her close. She reached up to turn the lamp off before snuggling into him.</p><p>Neil fell asleep sometime after Eva. Several hours later (though it felt like only five minutes), he was jolted awake by the sound of the door bursting open.</p><p>“Mama! Daddy!” came the loud, excited voice of his daughter. “Wake up! It’s Christmas!”</p><p>Neil’s only response was to grunt and close his eyes. He heard Grace jump onto the bed and felt her shake his shoulder.</p><p>“Daddy, <em>c’mon</em>,” she urged. “Santa came! We gotta open presents now! Wake up!”</p><p>“Five more minutes,” Neil mumbled, his eyes blinking open against his will. Through his blurred vision, he could see that the room was gray.</p><p>Apparently deeming him a lost cause, Grace scrambled over Neil to crawl onto Eva.</p><p>“Mama, it’s Christmas! Time to wake up! Time to open presents! Come <em>on</em>!”</p><p>Neil vaguely heard Eva groan in her sleep as he yawned. After groping for his glasses and putting them on, he sat up and snaked an arm around Grace, pulling her off of Eva and into a hug.</p><p>“Let’s let Mama sleep a little longer, yeah?”</p><p>“<em>Daddy</em>!” Grace whined, squirming impatiently in Neil’s arms. “We can’t open presents without Mama!”</p><p>“We won’t, I promise. But the presents—”</p><p><em>Won’t be going anywhere,</em> was what he was going to say, but Grace cut him off with a stubborn, “Gotta be opened!”</p><p>It didn’t take much longer before Neil let her go (he blamed it on still being tired). Grace once again crawled onto Eva and shook her shoulder.</p><p>“C’mon, Mama,” she said, her voice only a little quieter than before. “Santa got me a present. Don’t you wanna see what I got?”</p><p>Eva groaned again, and Grace stopped shaking her shoulder to lie down and curl herself up on her mother. Neil watched as Eva stirred from sleep, mumbling incoherently, which Grace took as her cue to lift her head and kiss her mother’s cheek.</p><p>“Yay, you’re up!” Grace kissed Eva’s cheek again. “Now we can get to the presents!”</p><p>Eva let out a sleepy hum, and Neil quickly pulled Grace off of her again as his wife rolled onto her back and stretched her arms upward.</p><p>“It’s Christmas now?” Eva slurred, yawning and sluggishly sitting up. She looked around before settling her gaze on Neil and Grace. “It’s still dark.”</p><p>“Grace really wanted to wake us up,” Neil told her. “I tried to stop her, but...”</p><p>Grace wiggled out of Neil’s grasp and hopped down from the bed. “Daddy, Mama, come on!” she exclaimed, jumping from foot to foot. “I wanna know what Santa brought me!”</p><p>“Mama needs coffee,” Eva mumbled as she wiped at her eyes.</p><p>“Sorry, hun,” Neil said, smiling apologetically at Grace. “You’re gonna have to wait some more.”</p><p>He got out of bed, took his pouting daughter by the hand, and led her out of the room. Eva staggered behind them, pulling on her robe. Neil didn’t let go of Grace’s hand until they were in the kitchen, where he made coffee for Eva and himself. With this done, Grace raced out of the kitchen, into the living room, and over to the tree. Neil and Eva followed after her and sat on the couch, their mugs in hand.</p><p>“Daddy, look!” Grace cried. “It’s for me! It says <em>To Grace, From Santa</em>! See?”</p><p>“I see it, Gracie,” Neil said, taking a gulp of his coffee.</p><p>“Can I open it now?”</p><p>“Sure,” Eva said through a yawn, blowing on her coffee before sipping at it.</p><p>Within seconds, Grace had torn into her present.</p><p>“The Easy-Bake Oven!” she squealed. “This was at the top of my wish list to Santa!”</p><p>“He knew you were a good girl all year,” Eva told her, “so he made sure you’d start with the present you wanted most.”</p><p>“Mm-hmm!” Grace agreed, clutching the Easy-Bake box to her chest and hurrying to her parents to climb up onto the couch between them. “But Christmas isn’t over yet, right, Mama?”</p><p>“That’s right, Grace,” Eva said, stroking the little girl’s hair. “I wrote to Santa saying we’d be going to Aunt Traci and Uncle Aaron’s house on Christmas, and he promised to send the rest of your presents there.”</p><p>Neil had to force himself to choke down the last of his coffee at Eva’s words. <em>Aw, damn it,</em> he thought as he put his empty mug on one of the coasters on the coffee table. <em>I was hoping she’d forget.</em> Spending Christmas Day anywhere that wasn’t at home with his wife and daughter was not something he liked doing, but Eva always insisted that they saw her family from time to time. “From time to time” included Christmas, which meant he’d have to spend the day keeping his complaints and snarky comments to a minimum. <em>That</em> was always the hardest thing to do.</p><p>Grace, quite oblivious to what was going through her father’s head, hummed happily, hugging her Easy-Bake box tighter. A few moments later, she was asleep, and Eva smiled, pressed a kiss to Grace’s temple, and placed her half-empty mug on another coaster before slowly extracting the box from Grace’s arms and setting it on the coffee table. Eva resettled on the couch, then frowned upon noticing Neil’s sulky expression.</p><p>“What?” she asked.</p><p>“Can’t we just skip the family visit this year?” he wanted to know.</p><p>“<em>Neil</em>.”</p><p>“You can call Traci and say I’ve come down with the plague.”</p><p>Eva rolled her eyes. “You know you’re not getting out of this.”</p><p>“Yeah, yeah, I know. Still worth a shot.”</p><p>Eva just hummed in reply. She eyed the still unopened present under the tree and asked, “So, are you going to open that?”</p><p>“I already know what it is,” Neil reminded her.</p><p>“What difference does that make? It still needs to be unwrapped.”</p><p>“It’s also not a surprise. But since you’re the one who stinks at gifting, that’s a good thing.”</p><p>Eva scoffed. “You’re just full of jokes this holiday season, aren’t you?”</p><p>“Aren’t I always?” Nonetheless, Neil eased himself off the couch, careful to not disturb Grace, and went over to the tree. He grabbed his present and returned to the couch, where he peeled off the bow and the wrapping paper.</p><p>Neil pretended to gasp. “Holy moly, the latest Nvidia graphics card!” He grinned cheekily at Eva. “Never would’ve guessed.”</p><p>She reached across Grace to pick the bow up from the couch and stick it on his cheek. Neil scowled, scraping the bow off and flicking it across the living room.</p><p>“Y’know, Eva,” he said dryly, “I have half a mind to say that Santa left coal in your stocking.”</p><p>Eva snorted at that. “Santa only gives coal to bad kids, and I haven’t been a kid in ages.”</p><p>“He could’ve change his policies since then.”</p><p>“I wouldn’t bet on it.”</p><p>Neil gave a casual shrug. “Guess there’s only one way to find out.” He set the Nvidia box on top of Grace’s Easy-Bake box and got up from the couch again. He took Eva’s stocking off the fireplace mantel and brought it over to her.</p><p>Eva pressed her fingers to the toe end of the stocking. “It doesn’t feel like coal to me.”</p><p>“Unless Santa just wants you to <em>think</em> it’s a normal present,” Neil quipped as he sat back down.</p><p>Without another word, Eva tipped the stocking over, the gift landing in her open hand. A couple of seconds passed as she tore through the paper to reveal a white box.</p><p>Eva gasped slightly once she opened the box’s lid, lifting a necklace from the bedding. Dangling from a thin silver chain was a single amethyst set in silver.</p><p>“This is Grace’s birthstone,” she said.</p><p>“Exactly,” Neil said, all banter forgotten for the moment. “Look at the back.”</p><p>Eva turned the pendant over. There, engraved into the silver surface, was <em>2/21</em>—Grace’s birthday.</p><p>“Whaddya think?” he asked.</p><p>She lowered the hand that was clutching the necklace and looked at him. Smiling softly, she leaned over Grace to kiss Neil on the lips.</p><p>“I think it’s beautiful,” she said after pulling away. “Thanks.”</p><p>“No problem,” he answered as he watched her open the clasp and bend her neck so she could put the necklace on. “At least now I don’t have to go back to the jeweler and explain why I’m returning it.”</p><p>Eva sighed, her smile fading. “A simple ‘you’re welcome’ would’ve sufficed.”</p><p>“Sorry, dumpling—couldn’t resist.”</p><p>He put an arm around her shoulders, and she didn’t try to shrug him off, so he considered that a win. For a while, they sat together in comfortable silence.</p><p>“So what now?” Neil asked at length. “You want to get started on breakfast or take a Christmas nap?”</p><p>“Honestly,” Eva replied, “getting two or three more hours of sleep sounds pretty good.”</p><p>She stood up from the couch, grabbed their coffee mugs, and headed to the kitchen. He stood as well, leaning down to pick Grace up. She didn’t so much as grunt as he shifted her so that her head rested on his shoulder. Eva soon returned without the mugs, and they went down the hall.</p><p>Rather than take Grace to her room, Neil brought her back into his and Eva’s and laid her down in the middle of their bed. There came a moment in every kid’s life when they decided they had outgrown cuddling with their parents, and Neil knew he’d have to savor these moments while he still could.</p><p>Eva made no objection to Grace being in bed with them as she slipped out of her robe. She got into bed and kissed their daughter on her cheek. As Neil climbed in on the other side, Eva rose up on her elbow and reached over towards him. He took her hand and kissed the pads of her fingers.</p><p>“Fifty bucks says we’ll wake up to find there’s been a blizzard and we’ll have to stay home,” Neil said.</p><p>“No betting on Christmas, Neil,” Eva told him.</p><p>“Can’t I at least hope for a Christmas miracle?”</p><p>She checked to see if Grace was still fast asleep before leaning in and slowly brushing her lips against his. When she next spoke, it was in a whisper.</p><p>“How about this? If you can spend the day at my sister’s house without any whining, I just might have something else you can unwrap tonight.”</p><p>“Are you bribing me?”</p><p>“So what if I am?”</p><p>It only took a split second for Neil to respond. “Okay, it’s a deal.”</p><p>Eva gave him a slight, amused smile. “Just remember to hold up your end of that deal.”</p>
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<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Virtual Matrimony</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This one-shot got weirdly difficult to write towards the end for some reason, but at least it’s finished so I don’t need to keep looking at it. Also, Generic Made-Up Videogame is generic and made-up (and inspired by the first Dragon Age game).</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Daddy, can you help me get married?”</p><p>Upon hearing the first word, Neil looked up from the paperwork he and Eva were filling out in the dining room, happy that Grace had given him the perfect excuse to ignore job-related crap. When he heard the rest of what she said, however, his heart just about stopped.</p><p>“<em>What</em>?!” Neil jumped out of his chair as though someone had lit a fire under it, his pen falling out of his hand and onto the table with a clatter. He heard Eva exasperatedly say his name, but all he could do was stare, completely flabbergasted, at Grace, who was standing in the room’s threshold and flinching in surprise at his outburst.</p><p>“What do you mean, get married?” he demanded, blood pounding in his ears. “You’re sixteen—that’s <em>way</em> too young to get married!”</p><p>“Daddy, I’m—” Grace began.</p><p>“You are <em>not</em> getting married under my roof, young lady!”</p><p>“Neil—” Eva started to say.</p><p>He interrupted her as a horrible thought suddenly occurred to him. “Wait a minute, do you have a boyfriend?! Are you <em>pregnant</em>!?”</p><p>“Good grief, <em>no</em>!” a now red-faced, wide-eyed Grace exclaimed, holding her hands up in protest. “No, no, no, no, no, no, <em>no</em>! Daddy, I’m <em>not</em> pregnant! And I don’t have a boyfriend!”</p><p>Neil was on the verge of saying something derogatory about whoever the punk that had dared to impregnate his little girl was before Grace had even finished, but a second later, his brain fully registered what she’d said.</p><p>“Wait, what?” Neil gaped at his daughter. “You’re not? You don’t?”</p><p>“Remember to breathe, Neil,” Eva said (when did she get up?), patting him on the shoulder.</p><p>Immense relief seeped into his veins as he dragged some air into his lungs. He let out a shaky laugh. “Sorry, Grace. Gut reaction.”</p><p>Grace lowered her hands, her face returning to its natural color. “That was some gut reaction,” she commented.</p><p>“Well, now that Daddy’s recovered from his near heart attack, do you mind elaborating on what you meant by getting married?” Eva asked, turning her attention to Grace.</p><p>“I meant getting married in a game,” Grace said. “I’ve been romancing Sir Alexander in <em>Griffin Age</em>, and I thought I did everything to get us married, but the wedding scene won’t trigger. I figured Daddy would know if I missed something.”</p><p>“Uh...” Neil paused, adjusting his glasses just to give himself something to do. “Do you mind waiting a bit, princess? Mama and I’ve still got paperwork that needs filling.”</p><p>Eva rolled her eyes, the look on her face blatantly saying, <em>Yeah, as if you weren’t whining about the paperwork five minutes ago.</em></p><p>Grace shrugged. “Okay, that’s fine. Just come into my room when you’re done.”</p><p>Eva’s annoyed expression didn’t soften after Grace left the room. “You do realize there are far worse things she could be doing than romancing a character in a videogame, right?”</p><p>“Fictional boyfriends are still boyfriends, Eva,” Neil countered.</p><p>“Boyfriends who you never have to worry about impregnating Grace.”</p><p>“Why must you have a good point?” He sighed and sat back down, staring without really seeing the papers spread out on the table. After a moment of silence, he said, “Wish we could go back to the days when boys had cooties.”</p><p>“I’m afraid our daughter was never going to stay little forever.” Eva took Neil’s hand in hers and gave it a small squeeze. “No matter how much we might’ve wanted her to.”</p><p>He looked up at her. “So you miss those days, too, huh?”</p><p>“Yeah, sometimes,” she admitted, smiling wistfully. “It doesn’t seem that long ago that Grace was asking us for a bedtime story.”</p><p>“Do you ever wish we’d had more?”</p><p>“More kids, you mean?”</p><p>Neil nodded.</p><p>Eva frowned. “Well, I can’t say I miss changing diapers, colic, or the terrible twos, but...yeah, sometimes,” she repeated with a soft exhale. “It’s all right, though. I wouldn’t change a day.”</p><p>She squeezed his hand again, then continued before Neil could say anything else. “Well, on that sentimental note, why don’t we get back to that paperwork?”</p><p>He grimaced as she let go. “You’re joking.”</p><p>“You’re stalling,” Eva responded, a teasing smile tugging at her lips. “The sooner we finish, the sooner you can help Grace marry her first boyfriend.”</p><p>“Do you think I could use the ‘I forgot because I’m old’ excuse to get out of it?”</p><p>Her answer, still accompanied by that small smile, was only one word and not very helpful. “Nope.”</p>
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<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Murphy's Law of Birthdays</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone! The fact that I’m posting a new chapter today is actually a coincidence—originally, I was going to be posting this on the 21st, but I’ll be visiting some relatives from the 18th to the 21st, so I decided to get this done as soon as possible.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Eva had to force back a groan upon entering the kitchen of one Brandon Bagshaw and finding Neil pacing the room with his phone at his ear.</p><p>“How’s Grace?” he was saying. “Has she gotten any more sleep? Is she still feeling nauseous?”</p><p>“Neil, you said you were going to call headquarters,” Eva scolded. What should have been an easy enough case had become complicated by the fact that the machine was failing to properly construct the young adult stage of Brandon’s memories. They’d learned from their patient’s doctor that Brandon had a history of drug abuse, but they wouldn’t be able to figure out how to proceed until they got access to his medical records.</p><p>Which Neil was <em>supposed</em> to be taking care of, but instead, he had called Ruth, something he’d been doing every hour since he and Eva left home this morning.</p><p>At present, Neil stopped pacing and shot her a glare. “I’m making sure our girl’s still breathing.”</p><p>“Brandon’s the one whose breathing you should be worried about.” Eva knew she was sounding harsh, but for the love of God, they had a dying client on their hands. As awful as Grace having the stomach flu was—the sound of her daughter throwing up what little she had eaten for breakfast and sobbing afterward was not something Eva wanted to hear again any time soon—at least it wouldn’t be long before she felt better. Brandon did not have that luxury.</p><p>If Neil had some biting comeback for her, Eva never found out. “What was that, Ruth?” he asked, returning his attention to the phone conversation. “Okay, good. Is Grace still awake?”</p><p>“No, Neil,” Eva protested, “let her sleep.”</p><p>“Too late.” Neil held the phone at arm’s length and pressed a button. “Hey, Gracie.”</p><p>“Hi, Daddy,” came Grace’s voice.</p><p>“Mama’s here, too—wanna say hi to her?”</p><p>“Hi, Mama.”</p><p>“Hi, Grace.” Eva stepped over to Neil, mouthing the words, <em>One minute,</em> at him. Out loud, she asked, “How are you feeling?”</p><p>“Sick.”</p><p>“I’m sorry, honey. Have you at least been able to eat anything today?”</p><p>“Ruth made me chicken noodle soup, and I didn’t throw it up.”</p><p>“Well, that’s good,” Neil chimed in. “It’s like your tummy gave you a birthday present.”</p><p>Grace giggled a little at that, then she asked, “Will I still have a party tomorrow?”</p><p>“Let’s see how you’re feeling then,” Eva told her.</p><p>“But what if I’m not feeling better?”</p><p>“Then we’ll just reschedule. Don’t worry—you’ll still get to celebrate your birthday.”</p><p>“Good. I’m a whole hand today, so we gotta have a party.”</p><p>Neil let out a feigned gasp. “You’re a whole hand?” he asked, grinning. “What happened to your eyes and hair and everything else?”</p><p>Grace giggled again. “You’re silly, Daddy. A whole hand means I’m five.”</p><p>“Ah, of course, my mistake.”</p><p>“Well, we need to get back to work,” Eva cut in. “Try to get some more rest, okay?”</p><p>“Wait,” Neil said, “before we hang up—Grace, whaddya say to having a bunch more balloons for the party?”</p><p>“Will they be pink?”</p><p>“Sure will.”</p><p>“Okay.”</p><p>Shortly afterward, goodbyes and “I love you”s were exchanged, and Neil ended the call.</p><p>“Neil—” Eva began.</p><p>“Yes, Brandon, I know,” he interrupted impatiently. “I’ll call headquarters next thing, all right?”</p><p>“I was actually about to say we’re not filling our house with balloons.”</p><p>Neil raised his eyebrows at Eva in confusion. “Who said anything about filling our house with balloons? I just want Grace to enjoy her party.”</p><p>“Knowing you, you’d buy out a whole store and then some.”</p><p>“So? Grace’ll only be five once and she’s had a rough birthday—if anyone deserves an extra fun party, it’s her.”</p><p>Eva shook her head. “I’ll tell you all the reasons why going all out for a birthday party won’t be feasible <em>after</em> we’ve finished with Brandon.”</p>
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<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Unconventional Lullabies</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Disclaimer: I don’t own either “Walking in Memphis” or “I’ll Be.”</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When Neil didn’t return to the kitchen thirty minutes after leaving with Grace to put her to bed, Eva wasn’t surprised. Despite the baby having settled into some patterns regarding sleep by fifteen weeks—such as the number of naps she took, or the amount of time she spent sleeping—at sixteen weeks, those patterns had been apparently forgotten. Lately, Grace was waking up more often at night, her naps were shorter, and it had gotten more difficult to get her to actually fall asleep. If Neil <em>had</em> managed to get their daughter sleeping in the time it took Eva to clean up after dinner, she would’ve considered it a small miracle.</p><p>At present, Eva left the kitchen and headed down the hall next to the living room, figuring that Neil could use some help. She wasn’t even halfway to their bedroom when she heard music playing. Soon enough, she made it to her destination and opened the door to find Neil cradling Grace in his arms, rocking her to the sound of a Marc Cohn song playing from his phone, which was placed on their bed.</p><p>“<em>Walking in Memphis,</em>” Neil sang. “<em>But do I really feel the way I feel?</em>”</p><p>“Interesting choice of lullaby, Neil,” Eva commented. He gave a start upon realizing she was there, and she continued, trying to keep the amusement out of her voice. “Did ‘Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star’ go out of style?”</p><p>“What can I say?” Neil asked rhetorically. “Grace’s developed a penchant for nineties soft rock.”</p><p>Eva couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped her throat. “Has she now?”</p><p>Neil slowed his rocking. “That, and bath time didn’t help get her to sleep.”</p><p>“Hence you trying to lull her with a song about a Jewish gospel music lover.”</p><p>“Hey, if it works.”</p><p>And it did seem to be working—Grace was now yawning and rubbing at her eyes. As Neil resumed singing, Eva stepped over to the bed to lower the music’s volume. After another moment, Grace’s eyes closed, and Neil walked to her crib and settled her down in it.</p><p>“So how long do you think she’ll be asleep?” Neil asked as Eva joined him in front of the crib, a new song beginning to play.</p><p>“With the way her schedule’s been? I doubt it’ll be an hour,” she admitted.</p><p>“Might as well make the best of it.” So saying, Neil wrapped his arms around Eva and pulled her into a hug, swaying her to the music.</p><p>“<em>Tell me that we belong together,</em>” he sang. “<em>Dress it up with the trappings of love.</em>”</p><p>Eva had to laugh a bit at that. Smiling, she let Neil continue their impromptu little dance until the song ended.</p>
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<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Mealtime Mayhem</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The terrible twos may have been a perfectly normal part of child development, but that didn’t mean it was a fun time for the parents who dealt with it. In Grace’s case, it was an everyday cycle of stubbornness, mood swings, and tantrums.</p><p>When Eva made it home, she found Neil in the dining room, covered in white macaroni and looking about as miserable as if he’d been given the death penalty. Grace was at the table, sitting in her dining booster seat and also covered in macaroni.</p><p>“Trouble with lunch?” Eva asked. The words were barely out of her mouth before Grace threw a fistful of macaroni at Neil’s face.</p><p>Neil’s glasses slipped down his nose as he gave Eva a pleading stare. “<em>Please</em> tell me we don’t have this to look forward to when she’s a teenager.”</p><p>Eva picked the macaroni out of her husband’s hair and gave him a quick, sympathetic kiss. She then stepped over to Grace, grasping the toddler’s hand and frowning sternly.</p><p>“We do <em>not</em> throw our food at Daddy,” she chided.</p><p>Grace scowled and wriggled in her seat. She waved her free hand at Eva, hitting her with the rest of the macaroni in her fist. Eva took a deep breath and wiped the pieces of pasta off her face.</p><p>“All right, that’s it—time for a time out.” She moved the chair Grace and her booster seat were sitting in so that it faced a corner of the dining room, then went into the kitchen to set the microwave’s timer for two minutes.</p><p>Grace screamed and cried as Eva and Neil picked the macaroni up from the floor. Once this was done, Neil leaned against the counter, looking dejected, and Eva patted him on the shoulder.</p><p>“I don’t know if Grace got up on the wrong side of her crib or what,” Neil said, “but she pitched a fit over everything. Her toys, naptime...and you saw how she was about eating.”</p><p>“It’s just a phase,” Eva told him. “As much as we don’t like it, tantrums are one of the only ways she has to express herself.”</p><p>“Yeah, expressing that she doesn’t love us anymore.”</p><p>“That’s your depression talking, not you,” Eva said, taking Neil’s hand in hers and squeezing softly.</p><p>After the timer went off, Eva returned to the dining room and turned Grace’s chair around. By now, Grace had gone from full-blown crying to quiet whimpering. Eva unbuckled her daughter out of the booster seat and picked her up in her arms.</p><p>“Are you done throwing food at people?” Eva wanted to know.</p><p>Grace nodded.</p><p>“Good.” Eva kissed the top of Grace’s head and brought her to Neil in the kitchen. “Now, tell Daddy you’re sorry and give him a kiss.”</p><p>Grace leaned in to kiss Neil’s cheek and pat his face with her sticky hand. “Sowwy, Daddy.”</p><p>Neil made a face, but it was quickly replaced with a smile. “Aw, apology accepted, princess.”</p>
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<a name="section0013"><h2>13. The Effects of a Daddy-Daughter Day</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Mama!”</p><p>Eva started from where she was sitting on the couch, dropping the book she’d been reading as Grace jumped into her lap for a hug.</p><p>“Hi, Grace,” she said, wrapping her arms around the four-year-old girl. A few hours ago, Neil and Grace left to go to the mall for a father-daughter date, something the two of them had been looking forward to for days. “Did you have fun with Daddy today?”</p><p>“Uh-huh!” Grace answered, nodding happily. “Daddy got me lots of pretty stuff!”</p><p>“I’ll bet he did.” Eva looked up to see Neil walk into the living room with his hands full of shopping bags.</p><p>“Grace’s now got enough pink ribbons, sparkly hairclips, pretty bracelets, and cute dresses to last her a month,” Neil said, dropping the bags on the carpet.</p><p>“Well, I sure hope you didn’t spend all our life savings on that month’s supply,” Eva quipped. “Have you had lunch?”</p><p>“Brownies!” Grace exclaimed, breaking her and Eva’s hug to leave her mother’s lap, stand up on the couch, and jump up and down.</p><p>“No jumping on the couch, Grace.” Eva stood up and took her daughter’s hands to stop her.</p><p>“And ice cream!” Grace added as she sat back down.</p><p>“Neil!” Eva scolded, whipping around to face her husband. “Brownies and ice cream is not lunch!”</p><p>“That was dessert,” Neil corrected, apparently unfazed by her reaction. “Chicken nuggets were lunch.”</p><p>“Daddy, can we go out again tomorrow?” Grace asked.</p><p>“Sorry, princess,” Neil said, “Mama and I gotta work.”</p><p>Grace groaned.</p><p>“No worries; you can go out with Daddy again another day,” Eva reassured her. “In the meantime, go run along to your room. Daddy and I need to find space for your new stuff.”</p><p>After Grace had done what she was told (“Be careful not to fall!” Eva called as her daughter actually ran out of the living room), Eva turned her attention back to Neil, a stern frown in place.</p><p>“If she doesn’t want to eat dinner because she’s had so much sugar, I’m blaming you entirely,” she informed him.</p><p>“Oh, c’mon, Eva,” Neil protested. “Dinner’s still hours away—Grace’ll be hungry again by then. And even if she’s not, skipping a meal once in her life isn’t gonna kill her.”</p><p>“You still shouldn’t spoil her as much as you do.”</p><p>“I don’t spoil her <em>that</em> much.”</p><p>“Really?” Eva asked rhetorically, gesturing at the numerous bags still lying on the carpet. “Then why did you buy all this?”</p><p>Neil momentarily paused. “Would you believe me if I said Grace couldn’t choose what the prettiest stuff was and decided she wanted everything?”</p><p>“Actually, I would,” Eva admitted, her mouth involuntarily twitching upward as she imagined Neil holding out two dresses and Grace pointing at both of them. Even so, she was quick to sober. “But I doubt you tried very hard to limit what she could have.”</p><p>“So I have a hard time saying no to our daughter. Are you really surprised?”</p><p>“I’d say yes, but I’d be lying.” Eva glanced down at the bags. “Now, if we find enough drawer and closet space for Grace’s new jewelry, hair accessories, and dresses, <em>then</em> I’ll be surprised.”</p>
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